One-Man Wolfpack

It's tough being the only one of your close friends that has a baby. Sometimes I feel like everyone is living this life without me... Like one day they'll be telling stories about this crazy time they had and everyone is laughing but I won't be a part of that story because I'm at home with the baby. And then the baby looks up at me or makes a funny face while he's sleeping or grabs onto my finger and I realize I have this wonderful life that isn't any less wonderful because I missed out on that crazy time. But still... it's tough. It's hard being the only one. If I had other 'mom friends' it wouldn't be so bad because we could all tell stories about what our child did the other day. I know people that have had babies, but there is nobody here where I live that I'm close to and has a baby. Except my hairdresser. Is it bad that one of the highlights of my life is going to the hair salon so I can have 'mom conversation'? It can get lonely being the only one in this phase of my life. But I'm also not unhappy because I have a child, I'm actually really happy because he is amazing and he is my heart. I just wish I had someone here going through the same thing. He started smiling last week and it completely melts my heart when he smiles. And when I hold him to my chest it feels like he is hugging me. And that melts my heart too. I stare at him all the time. He looks absolutely nothing like me. I thought that would make me sad. But it doesn't at all. I'm just so full of emotions when I look at him that I don't care who he looks like. I just love looking into his eyes. Or watching him breathe. He completes me (Jerry McGuire moment?). I miss my friends, I miss my old life where all I had to worry about was me. But I absolutely love my new life with my son. I guess these feelings are yet another symptom of quarter-life crisis. Transition can be tough. But change is good. Change makes you stronger. And I'm a fan of strength.